Saying No The Right Way

Bill Warner Tuesday, May 26, 2009

I just saw an interesting blog on Seth Goden’s Blog about saying no. This is all easier said then done, but should be practiced by all leaders and managers.

How to say no

You certainly need to play it straight with people and not sugar coat all your answers that might hurt someone or waffle so that people don’t really understand where you stand. The secret is to turn “no’s” into “what is possible” answers. Instead of just saying no to a request, respond with:

  • The conditions under which you will satisfy the request. This often explains why “no for now” is really the answer and indicates the conditions under which the answer will be yes.
  • The things that you need in order to be able to say yes. This puts the ball back in the court of the asker who needs to then think about the broader picture.
  • An explanation of the assumptions that are the basis for your answer as to when you will satisfy a request. This helps everyone understand the conditions for the answer being yes.

Add value in your answer

The opportunity you have in saying no the right way is transforming your answer into a collaborative problem solving conversation. All said and done, say no with professional firmness, but with a broader perspective than the asker often has. That adds value to all your relationships.

Filed Under: Business Operations, Business Coaching & Leadership Skills



Bill Warner is the Managing Partner of Paladin and Associates, a business consulting firm in the Research Triangle Park area of central North Carolina, and is the Chairman of the Triangle Accredited Capital Forum, an angel investor network with over one hundred members throughout the southeast.

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